Dear Mary: My husband and I don't see eye to eye when it comes to spending. He feels I should run every purchase I make by him, no matter how big or small. It has gotten so bad that he now highlights the "questionable" purchases on our Visa bill and leaves it for me to explain. I really can't stand being treated like a child. I work hard, and I'm not a spendthrift. I have become resentful of him, and it's starting to creep into other areas of our marriage. How can I get him to see how unreasonable he is?
-- Doreen, Maine
Dear Doreen: When one spouse is in charge of the money, it creates imbalance and opens the door to resentment and the conflicts both of you are experiencing. The way to resolve this problem is to work together as financial partners.
Tell him you want to negotiate an allowance system where each of you receives a set amount of money each month that you can do with as you please, no questions asked. This will give both of you the right balance of security and freedom. I'm sure his rules and heavy hand will melt away as "yours" and "mine" turns into "ours."
Dear Mary I've been going to the same stylist for more than five years. Usually, a haircut costs about $45. About two weeks ago, I discovered she had raised her prices to $60. Unfortunately, I didn't find this out until after she had already cut my hair and I was at the front desk with my credit card in hand.
I feel I
-- Robin, Arizona
Dear Robin: It was rude of her to put you into such an awkward position. The right thing would have been for her to post a notice of the price increase at least a month in advance. Her actions prove she doesn't value your friendship or your business, and you have every right to be upset.
Unless you have a written contract with her, however, you have no legal recourse. But you do have recourse as a consumer, and that's to take your business elsewhere. I'm sure you'll find another hairdresser that you like as well -- one that has business ethics, too.
Send questions to mary@every daycheapskate.com or Everyday Cheapskate, P.O. Box 2099, Cypress, CA 90630.