Maternity leave fading fast? Cut down on the back-to-work chaos with these tips from thenestbaby.com.
STEP 1: SET THE DATE
If your return date is flexible, you might be tempted to put off the decision as long as possible. Resist! The delay is nothing but unnecessary stress. Take the reins and move toward a decision. "The worst thing you can do is feel powerless," warns thenestbaby.com parenting expert Tammy Gold, founder of Gold Parent Coaching. "Look at your options, even if you don't have a lot of them. Is there a proposal you can put forth?" Write out your ideal plan and pitch it to your employer. "Be honest," Gold urges. Once you've set your date in stone, you can move on to trickier things, like ...
STEP 2: HIRE A CAREGIVER
Nanny? Group sitter? Day care? What works best for your family (and your budget)? Visit day care centers, interview sitters, check references and ask tons of questions. This isn't the time to be shy. Watch caregivers interact with your child and get a real feel for the ones you (and your baby) are comfortable with. Even if you've been on a prestigious waiting list since the baby was an embryo, you should introduce your child and make a final decision. And then? "Trust yourself," Gold insists. If the caregiver comes recommended, has the best credentials and feels right, go ahead and make a commitment.
STEP 3: TEST-DRIVE
A little rusty when it comes to certain life skills
STEP 4: STAY CONNECTED
Time in the office can make a momma feel out of touch. To help, talk with your caregiver to get a good idea of baby's daily schedule. This way, you can imagine her sleeping at naptime, strolling through the park at 11 a.m., and so on. Some moms are also using technology to their advantage. "My nanny and I text all day long. It's what gets me through the day!" admits one mom on thenestbaby.com Working Moms message board. Some day cares are even offering streaming video on their Web sites! Not so tech-savvy? Drop off a camera and ask caregivers to snap a few shots throughout the day.
STEP 5: COMMISERATE
Tons of moms have walked this path before. "You MUST connect," Gold encourages. "Mothering can be very isolating. The more you connect, the more comfortable you'll feel." Seek out other moms in your office, check out local groups for working mothers or visit parenting Web sites. On sites like thenestbaby.com, moms chat on message boards about their fears, roadblocks and successes. "You can learn a tremendous amount just by listening," says Gold. "Or you can engage online and type your concerns." Either way, you'll know you're not alone.
STEP 6: GIVE YOURSELF A BREAK
Emotions (and, yes, guilt) might run wild in those first weeks without baby. Relax — it's normal.
Give yourself permission to feel the way you feel. "Try setting aside five minutes of every hour to think about baby," encourages Gold. "Write down questions, ideas for things to do together ... whatever's on your mind. Then refocus on work until your next 'baby break.' " And don't be afraid to let a few things slide at home. "You CAN'T be everything," Gold says. Something's got to give. Let go of the elaborate meals. Put off the vacuuming. You're being a great mother, wife, and professional — don't worry about being a great maid.



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