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Yes, punishments can be fun.
Creativity expert, professor, father and former day care provider Rustin Wolfe applies his scientific techniques to some of life's smallest — but most exasperating — problems weekly at MinnMoms.com.
Here's one of his creative solutions:
Brushing Up
Question: How can I get my child to do a better job brushing his teeth?
Behavior: Shoddy teeth brushing.
Problem: Cavities.
Solution: By focusing him on the challenge of the productive task, he's less likely to be distracted by an unproductive one.
Activity: First, explain why it's important to do a good job brushing. Then, give your child a cooler toothbrush. I recently found a Charlie Brown two-pack at Target for just 99 cents. But the key is in the activity itself. You could go through a list of objectives with him as he brushes: front-back, left-right, top-bottom, inside-outside. And you can inspect when he's done to provide a little reinforcement. It's also important to make sure that he sees you brush. When my mouth feels a little icky during the day, I'll make a show of my bonus brushing. And I make it look fun.
Want Rustin's solution for your child's challenging
Read last week's problem and solution in the MinnMoms.com Expert Advice archive. Who is Rustin Wolfe? Education: Rustin Wolfe is an Associate Professor in the Doctor of Education in Leadership program at St. Mary's University of Minnesota. He received his Ph.D. and M.A. in Psychology from the University of Chicago, where he worked under Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, author of "Flow" and "Creativity." Rustin received his B.A. from the University of Wisconsin-Madison, with a major in Sociology and an individual major titled "Divergent Thought and Behavior." Rustin is a certified facilitator in Creative Problem Solving.
Childcare experience: As an undergraduate, Rustin worked as the lead teacher of a before/after school program. He has coached children of elementary age through college.
A month after he began working in day care, Rustin knew something had to change or he'd burn out. The bad behavior was getting to him. Despite his good intentions, the kids kept breaking the rules. And he came to dread discipline. So, that's precisely what he changed. Rustin decided to let go of the traditional time-out in favor of more creative punishments. He figured out how to — in a twisted sort of way — look forward to the next opportunity to come up with a novel consequence.
Rustin set up rules:The punishment had to be a logical consequence, it should try to undo the wrong that had been done, it should prioritize the facilitation of future behavior over punishing past behavior, and it shouldn't be intentionally boring.
Philosophy: Time-outs are for when we can't think of anything better. Every moment is a learning opportunity. Rustin challenges parents and caregivers — himself included — to ask themselves: How can we take advantage of the opportunities before us when a child misbehaves?
